Bias in us

Bias in Us

Lot of times we wonder why is our world not peaceful and why there is hatred, war, violence and why are people not happy with each other. I keep thinking about this a lot too and more so when I encounter bias or act with bias and then try to check myself. 

It is human nature may be to like people of our own kind. It is easier for us to accept people who are of the same skin color, same culture or same country or city. But again this cannot be generalized either. I have seen people from a single family, who cannot get along with each other. So we cannot say that this works in general. From what I have seen how much we see in common also varies depending on how broad our outlook or heart is. If we connect with people as just a human being may be there is lesser reason to act with any kind of bias. 

It is easier said and done to act without bias. Sometimes there are characteristic traits that are inherent in a particular race, or particular skin color or people of a particular country or city that cannot be ignored either. No one can be free from the influence of their culture, circumstances and upbringing. If we cannot accept that probably we should look for a common ground. It could just be knowing and sharing each others culture values. There is something common is all human beings. All of us are at least made by the same creator and if we believe God made us all, we must also agree he made us all different for a good reason. To breed hatred against a fellow human being is definitely not correct if we want to act as faithful, god loving or fearing human beings. But if we think like an atheist things are no different. If we were to take some time to think through our opinions we can see a contradiction easily. 

Lot of times people like me who write to express and idea are attacked socially as not being practical. It is just a talk or a thought is what I get. Actually it is more than a thought. It is a desire to see the world being a better place than what it is. I hope to see a better world around me. I try to think what I can from my little corner in the world. I have grown up accepting people of different cultures because I was taught tolerance in my upbringing. I grew up in a multi-cultural city called Hyderabad where we have people of all languages in India and we have people of all faiths. As a child I had friends from all religions and it never bothered me or my friends. It is only as I grew up that things started taking a different color in the world. By the time I was 22, the WTC tower was attacked and the world changed and everyone started feeling the fear of terror in the world. 

If we just take a step back, it was not that the terror ever left us since the beginning of civilization. It always existed just like bias. Millions were killed in the name of race, in the name of religion and also because of the greed for wealth and power. Yet, it is only now that world which is actually more secure for people than ever is living in fear. The lack of trust is at its epitome and people prefer to be left alone. We are caught in our self inflicted trap called media and mobiles and internet. We prefer virtual reality to reality. We prefer to trust the media than using our own judgement. We would rather call 911 than asking help from a neighbor. We would rather guard our privacy than opening our doors to some company. If few adults are at the school bus, or some place like a kids event, it is normal to feel out of place or left out as people hardly try to make new acquaintances. 

I always wonder why I cannot just be as I am. Why should I force myself to talk in a particular accent in English for the fear of being ridiculed? After all is it not a foreign language for me? Why should I wear western clothes which I am not comfortable with while I look better in clothes from my culture?

Most of the times it is because we do not want those stares from people around. We just dress according to the culture prevalent around us. We just adapt or at least try to adapt as much as we can. It is more tough for those who leave their own country or city to make a living somewhere far away. 

But the bias exists at home too. There is always something to make people go apart. Religion, wealth, culture, caste or creed.

My point is why do we focus so much on what is different. Why can't we focus on what is not different. We all breath the same air, we all share the same mother earth, we look at the same sun and moon. We all are human and we all have the same kind of physical and emotional needs. If only we could contemplate on what is common, we will see how common we are. If you look at a 5 year old from one country and compare them to another 5 year old in another country, they are very much alike in their energy and spirit. It the same common trait in teenagers. And it is same common trait in aged adults too. It appears that the differences originate with adult hood and die a natural death once we get older may be. Our experiences and our mindset is what leads to bias.  Most of the times bias does not actually originate from personal experience. What we have been brainwashed about is what leads to bias.

I would like to conclude by saying this. It is better to think with a broad mind, and lot of love and least amount of bias to feel the real happiness of being alive. The lesser our differences the greater is the joy of togetherness. It is impossible for a lonely soul to be happy despite being extremely rich. We need each other and we need to socialize. We should give right values to our kids, and let them grow up as people who care and share and are not too busy to smile at a stranger. Just this small change can make the world a much better place.